First, I love the fuck out of this. Second, the first paragraph gave me PTSD because I lived next to Fenway for 4 years, and those snapback swarms came rushing back into view.
oh gosh, I can't even imagine LIVING near all of that... the only Mercy I am afforded is that all the snapbackers get off at Kenmore and I get to keep on riding the green line far far away from them
I always wonder why there isn’t stricter enforcement of seating priority on the métro. The official signs still begin with Mutilés de guerre et mutilés militaires, which makes me wonder how many veterans from WWI or WWII are still alive—let alone riding public transport. Then come pregnant women, people with disabilities (other than war-related), etc.
And yet, not a word about why teenagers—who should be the very embodiment of youthful energ - are the ones taking up seats at rush hour, slouched in poses of exhausted resignation. What exactly are they recovering from?
I genuinely think about the social politics of this stuff almost every day. I try not to be presumptive because it's impossible to know how anyone has spent their day but when I see a classic little old lady with a dozen bags get on the train and not a single youth moves for her to sit it is pretty infuriating. People around here also have a habit of putting their bags on the seats and sometimes will not move them for another person to sit no matter how crowded the train is. Drives me up the wall. The only 'enforcement' (at least on my subway) is other riders making someone feel guilty for their poor behavior. It works pretty well lol
I don't find younger people to be the ones who are so rude and oblivious as to refuse to relinquish their seat in these situations. Twenty and Thirtysomething white guys manspreading their entitlement, resentment and insecure masculinity do this far more often. Gen Z kids are more socially aware and kind, in my experience, than the generation who came before. All the middle class white guys who feel so very put upon when asked to behave like grownups and recognize and respect the rights and feelings of others. Basically just the echo Boomers. Since we're generalizing.
I am getting to that little old lady age, and when I am traveling don't ask for a seat, but love it when someone does it for me, preferably another old lady, but the scary kind, the retired principal or Sunday school teacher, who tells the offender to mind their manners.
Really enjoyed your piece. The noticing and wondering and does everyone do that, or just some of us?
I once saw someone refuse to give up their seat for a pregnant woman. They said that she wasn't really pregnant, just fat, and that she was only implying she was pregnant so she could get a seat on a crowded rush-hour train.
I love this! Your unmatched empathy skills and your heartfelt prose style that’s embodied within your beautiful writing shines through like no other. It’s a privilege, pleasure, and joy to read writing that’s so importantly honest, strong, and powerfully meaningful. I laughed, I cried, I nodded along in recognition. Seriously I feel so lucky and unbelievably fortunate to have come across your beautiful writing here. Thank you for sharing your wonderful, vulnerable, tragically comic, and lucid description of life on a moving train. I relate wholeheartedly. So good <3
Are you supposed to call people with pronoun pins 'you'? Isn't this upsetting, or violent or something? I think I remember hearing something like that.
I've lived in Paris and Paris-adjacent for a decade now, and I will say that despite the occasional loud video calls and music on people's phones, the social contract is a bit more respectful here. There are sometimes French football hooligans who pound and stomp and shout unintelligible chants that sound more like collective belches than songs. It's also fun to watch tourists from nearby countries and see how their behaviors confirm or defy stereotypes (to be honest, most of the time they're confirmed).
It's nice to see people still reading books in a train, subway, or bus here. Gives me hope.
I don't even mind the elbows and shoulders, the backpacks, because it happens on a human scale. It's such a far cry from my decade in Los Angeles, where we all lined up in our individual mechanical bubbles to shout muffled fury at each other's mechanical bubbles.
That sounds supremely refreshing. It comes in waves here—it’s a mess when all the new college students flood the city and a whole new mass of kids have to learn how to be around others. Then things settle a bit and I see flashes of that utopia where people have the shuffle figured out, the readers and quiet thinkers dominate. Then baseball season topples it all once more. It balances out a bit in the summer and then starts all over again. It’s all just people being people though. There will unfortunately never be public transit utopia as people have to learn over and over again the rules of etiquette, which are always changing. To read, and be polite, and smile, and offer a seat is all we can do sometimes.
Thanks for sharing, Zach, I loved this perspective.(:
Being on a crowded train made me reminisce about, unfortunately, rush hour in N.Y.C. Whenever my stop was coming up, I had to make a plan to get strategically placed so that I would be able to exit. Sometimes I didn't make it out and would watch as my stop went by. I would get off as soon as possible and get on a train, also very crowded, going back. Sometimes I couldn't even get on a train going back. They were packed with people. I felt like I was trying to push my way into a very crowded sardine can. And when I did the people in back of me would push me to the middle of the train, and away from the exit. And amazingly, sometimes I would watch in horror because I had the same problem again. I hated it so much that I eventually started working later hours just to avoid it. I started working at night. And now all I had to worry about was muggers and the homeless as they descended on the less crowded trains.
Most bothersome train ettiquette: sitting with a bag or even just your body blocking an open while watching more and more people sardine and sway into one another like a singular entity, no stabilizing grip within reach. Now I'm just wondering if you correctly guessed my stop... Keep writing :)
Truly, this is everyone's life, whether it be bus, subway, train, plane, vechicle... we are all on life's journey to our final destination ✨️ looking for the last door before we pass over to another reality???
So good. Baseball? Baseball.
First, I love the fuck out of this. Second, the first paragraph gave me PTSD because I lived next to Fenway for 4 years, and those snapback swarms came rushing back into view.
oh gosh, I can't even imagine LIVING near all of that... the only Mercy I am afforded is that all the snapbackers get off at Kenmore and I get to keep on riding the green line far far away from them
the only upside was in the summer I could open my windows and hear the concerts
I always wonder why there isn’t stricter enforcement of seating priority on the métro. The official signs still begin with Mutilés de guerre et mutilés militaires, which makes me wonder how many veterans from WWI or WWII are still alive—let alone riding public transport. Then come pregnant women, people with disabilities (other than war-related), etc.
And yet, not a word about why teenagers—who should be the very embodiment of youthful energ - are the ones taking up seats at rush hour, slouched in poses of exhausted resignation. What exactly are they recovering from?
I genuinely think about the social politics of this stuff almost every day. I try not to be presumptive because it's impossible to know how anyone has spent their day but when I see a classic little old lady with a dozen bags get on the train and not a single youth moves for her to sit it is pretty infuriating. People around here also have a habit of putting their bags on the seats and sometimes will not move them for another person to sit no matter how crowded the train is. Drives me up the wall. The only 'enforcement' (at least on my subway) is other riders making someone feel guilty for their poor behavior. It works pretty well lol
I don't find younger people to be the ones who are so rude and oblivious as to refuse to relinquish their seat in these situations. Twenty and Thirtysomething white guys manspreading their entitlement, resentment and insecure masculinity do this far more often. Gen Z kids are more socially aware and kind, in my experience, than the generation who came before. All the middle class white guys who feel so very put upon when asked to behave like grownups and recognize and respect the rights and feelings of others. Basically just the echo Boomers. Since we're generalizing.
I am getting to that little old lady age, and when I am traveling don't ask for a seat, but love it when someone does it for me, preferably another old lady, but the scary kind, the retired principal or Sunday school teacher, who tells the offender to mind their manners.
Really enjoyed your piece. The noticing and wondering and does everyone do that, or just some of us?
I once saw someone refuse to give up their seat for a pregnant woman. They said that she wasn't really pregnant, just fat, and that she was only implying she was pregnant so she could get a seat on a crowded rush-hour train.
Nicely written . Really liked your writing style.
this red line ass vignette...
now molly you better damn know i’m a green line girl, i will not allow this lie on My Big Breakout Post….
I love this! Your unmatched empathy skills and your heartfelt prose style that’s embodied within your beautiful writing shines through like no other. It’s a privilege, pleasure, and joy to read writing that’s so importantly honest, strong, and powerfully meaningful. I laughed, I cried, I nodded along in recognition. Seriously I feel so lucky and unbelievably fortunate to have come across your beautiful writing here. Thank you for sharing your wonderful, vulnerable, tragically comic, and lucid description of life on a moving train. I relate wholeheartedly. So good <3
Harvard Ave used to be my stop because I lived on Royce Rd.
Are you supposed to call people with pronoun pins 'you'? Isn't this upsetting, or violent or something? I think I remember hearing something like that.
This is a deep, satisfying, human answer to the question, "Who is that stranger standing over there?"
I've lived in Paris and Paris-adjacent for a decade now, and I will say that despite the occasional loud video calls and music on people's phones, the social contract is a bit more respectful here. There are sometimes French football hooligans who pound and stomp and shout unintelligible chants that sound more like collective belches than songs. It's also fun to watch tourists from nearby countries and see how their behaviors confirm or defy stereotypes (to be honest, most of the time they're confirmed).
It's nice to see people still reading books in a train, subway, or bus here. Gives me hope.
I don't even mind the elbows and shoulders, the backpacks, because it happens on a human scale. It's such a far cry from my decade in Los Angeles, where we all lined up in our individual mechanical bubbles to shout muffled fury at each other's mechanical bubbles.
That sounds supremely refreshing. It comes in waves here—it’s a mess when all the new college students flood the city and a whole new mass of kids have to learn how to be around others. Then things settle a bit and I see flashes of that utopia where people have the shuffle figured out, the readers and quiet thinkers dominate. Then baseball season topples it all once more. It balances out a bit in the summer and then starts all over again. It’s all just people being people though. There will unfortunately never be public transit utopia as people have to learn over and over again the rules of etiquette, which are always changing. To read, and be polite, and smile, and offer a seat is all we can do sometimes.
Thanks for sharing, Zach, I loved this perspective.(:
I love public transport revelations. This is wonderful.
Being on a crowded train made me reminisce about, unfortunately, rush hour in N.Y.C. Whenever my stop was coming up, I had to make a plan to get strategically placed so that I would be able to exit. Sometimes I didn't make it out and would watch as my stop went by. I would get off as soon as possible and get on a train, also very crowded, going back. Sometimes I couldn't even get on a train going back. They were packed with people. I felt like I was trying to push my way into a very crowded sardine can. And when I did the people in back of me would push me to the middle of the train, and away from the exit. And amazingly, sometimes I would watch in horror because I had the same problem again. I hated it so much that I eventually started working later hours just to avoid it. I started working at night. And now all I had to worry about was muggers and the homeless as they descended on the less crowded trains.
Most bothersome train ettiquette: sitting with a bag or even just your body blocking an open while watching more and more people sardine and sway into one another like a singular entity, no stabilizing grip within reach. Now I'm just wondering if you correctly guessed my stop... Keep writing :)
Truly, this is everyone's life, whether it be bus, subway, train, plane, vechicle... we are all on life's journey to our final destination ✨️ looking for the last door before we pass over to another reality???
Fantastic piece. I loved every word of this.